I read a book by Eckhart Tolle called The power of now. It says our mind creates all kinds of discomforts.
When we are in the moment of not focusing on the past or future we really can enjoy life in a greater sense.
This reminded me of the enlightened day I had. I wished my mind had stayed that way. Eckhart says he became like that with one realization which is hard to come by for most people but it can come through the practice of observation or witnessing I read.
As I did more of the meditation I was aware that the mind operated through ego and made me miserable by its insanity. I also realized this was the case for most people. Eckhart says just observe don’t get involved with the mind; although it seemed simple it takes a great deal of patience.
I started to meditate or be conscious of my thoughts even though my thoughts seemed scary. I then had a huge “Aha!” moment.
It all made sense; why my life was hell… It wasn’t because of outside factors …. It was the thinking patterns my mind unknowingly created that was wrecking me.
These negative thoughts that were replayed in my brain were making me miserable. I instantly knew that I had to love myself. I knew why I felt other people judged me; it was because I judged myself critically. I knew I was the one who needed to change and no one else.
I started to listen to positive affirmation audios twice a day. It says things like “I am beautiful just the way I am, I don’t need to be perfect/ my imperfection is my beauty, I can do anything I put my mind to, I am confident, I am loved, I use my anger in a constructive way, I am bigger than what happens to me, I welcome changes that happen in my life positively, I accept things I can’t change, my perceived limitations are now in the past’’…
Beginning with these affirmations wasn’t easy; my body and mind almost rejected it by fear of change but I continued for a while.
One day I was going in my car and my usual pessimism about life started to show making me feel unworthy and unloved. I then started to listen to the positive affirmation audio on my phone. I let the positive connotations sink in and felt the negative thoughts disappear like clouds. The feeling was exhilarating and I felt like all the closed doors opened for me. I understood that there was a profound way to love myself and feel good about myself.
Observation of my thoughts/ meditation and practicing positive affirmation are what made me hopeful in life.
BY SENAIT G/HIWOT
The Ethiopian Herald 14 May 2022
