Ephrem Endale Contributer
A simple question; how many times have you heard couple quarreling over the use (or abuse!) of the cellphone? I mean there is only as much anybody can take when the cell continues blaring at all hours! People could be so inconsiderate that they call at the most bizarre hours.
Nighttime, they are watching TV. Her cellphone rings for the seventh time within seventy minutes.
“Hi, Elsi!… (laughter)….How are you?”….You don’t say?…No, I haven’t seen her lately…. What!…What do you mean married?…She’s already married!…yes that what I’m saying is they have been living under the same room they are under the same room they must be married!…(laughter)….Ok: we’ll meet at that wedding….How is that brother of yours?… Say hello for me…Ok… (laughter) Ok, good night.”
Siting by her side the guy’s boiling within. His software flushes out some ‘questionable’ words and phrases! Yes the lady might be talking in codes. He needs a code breaker; ‘That brother of yours!’ If he remembers correctly her friend Elsi, at list the Elsi he knows is an only child! Where did the ‘brother’ talk come from? And he would have continued musing the whole night had it not been for her phone ringing yet again.
“Beti!…I’m not talking to you!…Why?…You know Why. You promised to give me that thing!…what! You gave it to him!…You give it to that good for nothing…. (All of a sudden she realizes Mr. Hubby was barely ammeter from her.)… ”
She is still talking when his suspicion machine goes into overdrive! ‘So now she is openly talking about him! How many ‘hims’ are there that I don’t know of? First it was ‘that thing.’ no it’s ‘him.’ next I will hear a name.’ no you won’t. You don’t know who you’re dealing with!
Many times we hear of couples spying on each other’s cellphones. And the stories are many times such snooping led to scenes worthy of second-rate Hollywood! Privacy! What privacy? It is your spouse.
And no one is going to tell you not to do whatever you want with your spouse’s cellphone. In fact, it is like “You know our friend beat up his wife last night.”
“So, what’s the big deal; after all, she’s his wife!” Forget the high rises. When it comes to such things many of us are still in the underground.
Look, too many of us seem to be more in love with our phones rather than our spouses or other family members; So much so that the very sound of the ringtone drives us into some kind of mini-ecstasy. I know this lady who simply adores the ringtone.
She has two cells, and every few minutes one would ring. If in case several minutes pass in silence she calls one of her numbers with the other one and vice versa. And for her there is nothing wrong in that! Some of us go into real extremes.
And then his phone rings.
Hey!…Oh you son of a gun!….where have you been?….(laughter)…It has been a month, or is it a month and a half?…so when are we getting together for beer?…Ok, that’s fair…” About thirteen minutes and some later he says his goodbye. He puts his phone continues watching whatever was on the screen. By that time the ‘breaking news,’ have ceased being breaking while he was on the phone.
Exactly eleven and half minutes there is another call. He looks at the number, and he’s all teeth.
“I can’t believe it… Is it really you…Yes, I am surprised that you called…Really… So
we’re going to see you on TV one of this days….I never knew you were interested in politics…Oh…Nice; if you like it, you like it….Who, me?…are you kidding…” Thirteen minutes later he hangs up.
So you see these days it goes both ways.
And many times when problems arise it he who starts everything.
“Aren’t you tired of talking on the phone the whole day and night?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You are disturbing me! You are making my days and nights hell! You’re…
Now this sudden outburst digs up all those, “Why? And “Why now?” questions in her. She hasn’t seen him so angry, why now? And then those yet unidentified genes start the conspiracy theories.
Believe me many times the silent cellphone is a blessing and not a curse as many of us would like to think of it.
Midnight; the family is fast asleep when his or her phone booms startling them. I mean usually a call at that hour is not sum posed to be about good things. Something must have happened! It is his phone;
“Hello! Oh…fine…Yes I was sleeping…You are drunk…”
(Her ‘antennas’ are practically piercing the sky! A drunk calling at this time of the night! Or is it the other lady’ and they are talking in codes?) “…I imagine you guys are happy….Oh…” Why does he stammer? The drunk is supposed to be on the other end of the phone! (…Ok…Say hello for me…tell her we’ll meet at the weekend….Ok; bye!”
(What! he doesn’t even try to cover his infidelity! Weekend!
As he slides back into his bed he notices then
the lady with a thousand question marks on her face.
“We were talking about Mesfin’s wife!” Who asked? Whoever asked him her identity? Why does he answer a question she never asked! Aha! So that’s it!
Once I knew this guy who vowed he’ll never use the cell phone. And for a couple of years he kept to his word fending of all temptations. A little on the spiritual side his argument was that it might lead him into unwanted territories. But then he was forced to go back on his words and own one. He could no more keep on wrestling with reality. These days without cellphone you can do practically nothing!
And our cellphones should be ‘smart.’ (It is as if some of us are after the ‘smartness’ that eluded us through our cellphones. Walking about with a thirty thousand Birr toy in your pocket calls for some tough nerves!) Yes these days for many its smartphones or nothing, as if we can’t live without them. It’s about Facebook or Twitter or the many apps.
A relative of mine whom I thought still believed the world is flat asked me once, “Do you use IMO?” It was a question that practically blew me away coming from her. My answer could blew you away; “No, I don’t!” there those of us still trying to catch up with almost everyone else.
What the cellphone is actually doing to our brains, that’s for the scientists. I mean, the way some of us are going about it must be doing something to our brains.
And there is the talk of all the satellites snooping down on us. We hear that with the advanced technology the powerful possess, we are never alone!
Why is my cell silent for so long? It’s almost forty-five minutes since the last call! Ha!
The Ethiopian Herald February 21/2021