From the Coffee Ceremony to the Gursha!
A few days back I was watching a new Amharic music clip, something I rarely do these days. Not that I am any music critic or anything like that. I’ve to admit being an old school kind of guy many of more recent productions interest me neither in their musical arrangements nor in their messages. I think there were much more socially significant, message-carrying productions in earlier times. By the way, one fact that we usually miss when talking about such things is that the musicians of yesteryears were salaried employees of certain bodies in contrast to many of the musicians of these days. So they can be as creative as they can since they don’t have to worry about sales and album reprints. These days it’s all about, what else, business! So it seems socially noteworthy productions aren’t cash cows in the present music industry. But once in a while something significantly better than much of the musical muddle comes onto the spotlight; but unfortunately the lifespan of such productions appear to be short, too short as the spotlight moves elsewhere.
Anyways I clicked on this clip I was telling you about because of a positive FB comment of a person I highly respect who commended the clip of a male and female duo for bringing back memories of long past ages. I liked it and it got me thinking why in the world we seem to have thrown away all those wonderful social norms.
Political rhetoric these days seem to be dominated by the very people who should have been sanctioned not to come within a continent and an ocean of politics. Yes, politics might be free for all; but certainly not in the manner such sections of society are acting. Such sections are usually based on hatred of and scorn for what they call the other side, and they always try to sow the seeds of hatred and try to throw out the window anything of times passed and replace them with their own poisonous rhetoric Tired! Really tired of such sections! Thiers are the most brazen of acts of trying to discredit all the good that has been done in the past just for the sake of their political gain and their coffers wherever they are and in whatever way they deem appropriate.
Take the traditional coffee ceremony with all the green grass on the floor, the flavor of the bellowing incense, the aroma of ground coffee which is prepared right under your eyes. The very sound of the coffee being ground is enough to stir long buried memories. We raised such issue a couple of times before. But the clip I’m telling you about really coaxed anyone familiar with the original coffee ceremony and the air of string social bonds that surrounds it.
These days we see ‘coffee ceremonies’ in flashy restaurants and hotels creeping up all over this city. With scores of flashy cups, eye-catching rugs and all the decorative things no denial they create real spectacle. It might be nice especially to foreigners or those craving for such colorful and festive sort of ambiance. However in traditional coffee ceremonies every bit of action is done for some reason. I can tell you that you wouldn’t find much of those for-your-eyes-only-things over there. They are not about creating spectacles but about strengthening social bonds.
Much of the criticism of the old coffee ceremony where usually house wives congregate and pass time is that there is a lot of talk and many pseudo-modern souls see those gatherings as sort of mini-gossip factories and nothing more. That is where the main mistake comes. Talking the gossip the ‘insanely civilized’ souls of modern days don’t have the integrity or moral stranding to accuse past mothers of being gossip mongers. I’ll tell you. The same detractors are the very souls who have actually weaponized gossip! The so-called gossip of the not-so-civilized age were mostly harmless “He said this!” “She did that!” sort of ‘gossip’ that was nothing more than misplaced small talk. Seldom was ‘gossip’ as weaponized as it is presently. I’m not claiming there was no vile talk aimed at hurting some innocent people but only that you can’s wail about the rabbit while the whole elephant is in the room! Do something about the elephant before dealing with the rabbit!
Then…
“Did you hear?”
“Did I hear what?”
“That. The family of W/o…bought a new sofa set.”
“Where did they get the money?” A couple of lines later the small talk (‘gossip!) is dead!
Now…
“Did you hear the family of…. bought a two hundred-and-fifty grand sofa set?”
“Really!”
“I saw it with my own eyes.”
“I‘ll tell you what we’ll do. Her family won’t enjoy their new sofa. I’ll make sure of that!”
“Why would you do that?”
“I hate those people.”
“But they have done you no harm!”
“They don’t have to.” I can tell you this goes on for a few more miles until agreement is reached about what to do with that family.
By the way even VIPs and bosses gather around the coffee ceremony in hotels and talk over things with their guests black, white or whatever. In fact some seem to take time discussing God knows what. But we don’t accuse them of gossip mongering. Ha!
Speaking of that clip take this practice of sending the smaller kids to go around and tell people coffee is ready. Quite a big knock on the door with very tiny hands”
“Who is it?”
“Etiye…. mom says coffee is ready!” and off to the next neighbor. In fact if a lady in whose house the coffee ceremony is being held that day forgets to call one of the usual guests I can tell you she’d be in quite hot waters. Nothing could be more disrespectful!
In the clip I’m telling you about the duo bring memories of the gursha; gursha in the real sense of the word not gursha of bribery. Now we use traditionally use our bare hands to eat almost all of our local food. (Who am I telling this to?) Any way say a lady on that other side scoops up quite a large piece of enjera wraps it around the wot and goes to the person and puts it in their mouths. What could be more intimate! If you think that’s small potatoes then you’ll really have some homework you should be looking into. The gursha is an expression of the closeness and intimacy and/or respect of both the ‘giver’ and the ‘taker.’ No act would be as offensive as declining someone’s gursha! They wouldn’t be happy. I’ve to admit that’s a position I found myself in more than a few times. For some reason I decline gursha even from close relatives and best friends. Luckily most of them know this and let me off with, “Oh, that’s him.” But a couple of times years back things got a little bungled up and the host lady whose gursha a few times didn’t have any nice words for me. She took my declining as the litmus test of my whole unsocial character! (I can imagine some souls “I never thought this guy was so superstitious! What does he think they’ll put in his mouth along with the food!” Your request for forgives at this little mistake accepted. Hmm…)
But all said the gursha is a show of intimacy and in these times of much discord and moral decadence I think the gursha deserves all the cheers it can get!
Now, today being a Sunday how about a gursha to the other person!
THE ETHIOPIAN HERALD SUNDAY EDITION 25 DECEMBER 2022