I’ll tell you what I’m going to do. I’m going to form a group. Yes, that’s what I should do, form some group and join in ion the action. Come on, everyone seems to be forming one! And why should I be like someone who has been cursed to be the loyal onlooker when I can ruffle some feathers and get the action of the TV cameras? After all that’s what many seem to be after these days, the TV cameras!
Now first I need to recruit the perfect team. I’m not going to include some wise guy who always presses me to give him reasons or whatever every time I propose something and even voice simple ideas. The strategy of proving themselves for some wise guys is make the likes of me and you seem the dumbest creatures on two legs. No, such fellow aren’t welcome in my group. Do you think I’ve been reading and rereading Forty Eight Laws of Power for nothing all those years! No sir, the bright guys for all I care could go to some big capitals where they seem to be in acute shortage of wise guys. See, even if I closed my doors in their faces I’m not wishing them ill! Don’t you think it’s time to stand up and acknowledge my….
Oh, wait a minute! Wait just a minute! What the hell am I doing? I didn’t even decide what the group would be about? Of course it doesn’t mean I am alone. Sometimes I feel that certain groups have decided what they’re all about. So why should I worry about what at this stage? So, I better kick off the recruitment process. It will happen ‘secretly.’ You know that the recruitment was held ‘secretly’ would later give my group that air of importance. “You have to give the guy some credit! Why, he recruited members secretly in times where ‘secrets’ easily slip into the public domain!”
There was this Amharic slogan which says something like “We’ll put nature under our control!” And the story goes this company bus carrying workers was passing by when a worker notices this slogan. And under his breath he murmurs, something like “Is that so!” they picked him up the next day and he was locked for some days.
Well a stranger is a stranger. I’ll tell you when you’ll be thinking of a long walk to the nearest tree shade of the Amazon, when the person you have known for three decades suddenly turns into a complete stranger. The change is so sudden and so there wasn’t any grey area leading you to suspect something was wrong. So almost ninety-nine percent of those I personally know are out of contention! I don’t care how close we are. I mean, of course I’ll treat them to a few bottles of beer. Isn’t that more than enough to prove that as a dear friend I’ve some space for them in my heart? Anyone who’s aware what a bottle of beer costs these days would sympathize with me.
I don’t want surprises; not when I’m trying to form a group which will consider me as a “the wisest guy in town.’ Imagine the mess a childhood friend who knows me inside out could create when I have my sights on the mini-throne of my group!
“What do you mean he is considered as some kind of wise guy?
“The members like him very much. You should see the way they scramble to get his attention.”
“They must be a bunch of fools!”
“Why do you say that?”
“He’s my childhood friend! He made the people of our village so crazy with his deeds that parents warned their children not to make friends with him.”
“You mean he was that bad?”
“Bad is an understatement. He’s a complete moron and the entire village knew it. And you are telling me they consider him as some special person!”
Now are you convinced childhood friend are good for that gossip around beer and not to be part of a group. Why he might even spill the secrets why no girlfriend stays with you for more than three weeks! And believe that isn’t going to look good on your founder-of-the-group résumé! My first targets would be those who have been kicked out from other groups. First they have this rage of getting back at their former colleagues and that would be good for me. If I’m going to be in the spotlight some of those already there have to make way; and who is more useful than a former colleague-turned-enemy to launch an all-out attack! They’ll be handy in eliminating competing groups by going on the social and elsewhere and spilling the beans.
THE ETHIOPIAN HERALD SUNDAY EDITION 28 AUGUST 2022