For a lay man, enmity is crudely an antagonistic mental attitude held against someone who is considered harmful to one’s wellbeing. In other words, it is a state or feeling of active opposition or hostility. Dictionary definition of enmity is a feeling or condition of hostility; hatred; ill will; animosity; antagonism. It all indicates deep-seated dislike or ill will towards another person, a group or a country. Hostility or enmity implies strong, open enmity that shows itself in attacks or aggression. Enmity can be an overt or concealed hatred. As a matter of fact, some people appear friendly whereas in truth they are full of hatred from inside. Their viciousness is shown openly. So the holders of the feeling enmity can easily be identified and proper care can be taken for personal protection.
Enmity has its causes to take place. The basic reason behind all the enmities is undoubtedly the conflict of desires. Strong longing to achieve some objective can often be impeded due to the interference of another person with the same motive. Thus, when actions of a particular individual clash with the desires of another, unpleasant feelings are created which subsequently generate the enmity. Backbiting, slandering of a person, is the worst bane or the worst cause of trouble of human life, and makes a man the enemy of another. It is the backbiter and gossipers who sow seeds of enmity.
The psychology of enmity is such that we do in fact love or hate our enemies to the same degree that we love or hate ourselves. Let alone others, there are situations that force us to hate ourselves. You may wonder how much more a person who hates himself hates others. Enmity does not operate on individuals only. The roots and dynamics of enmity operate on the individual, group and at national levels as well. The philosophy of enmity is based on the premise ‘that guns do not kill, people do’. To be exact, it is not even people, it’s in people’s heads. Before we aim the gun we have first to envision the destruction of the enemy in our minds. Since wars begin in the minds of men, it is in the minds of men that we have to erect the ramparts of peace. The protection of peace should, of course, begin in the mind.
As aforementioned enmity is a bad feeling for each other or one another. One should discharge the responsibilities of friendship in his friend’s absence even more sincerely than when his is present. A friend, like the mirror, should, tell the faults to his face.
On the contrary, there are situations when you cannot tell a friend to his face. For instance issues concerning national security, things must be handled differently and tactfully and secretly. For instance, spying, to keep a vigilant eye on the subversive activities of disloyal citizens of a country, it is essential to have a secret service or an intelligence bureau. National security demands its existence and efficient functioning. But in respect of personal matters, spying is not condoned. In some religion it is believed that God strictly prohibits spying on an individual unless he notoriously behaves with respect to national issues. God does not approve of our spying on other people with the objective of finding out their vices and weaknesses. They reiterate that if somebody speaks ill of us in our absence, God wishes that we should not be informed of it because all chances of our good relations with that person would vanish.
Just as one disease begets another – for instance constipation may cause fever which may develop into typhoid, and that in turn may be followed by pneumonia, tuberculosis and death. In the same way, backbiting generates many other evil acts predominantly enmity.
A backbiter becomes the worst type of hypocrite. In order to maintain his own prestige, he poses as a friend of those whom he actually undermines and seeks to destroy. When he is suspected of evil designs, he would deceive others by taking false oath. On the other hand he flatters his superiors lest they should expose his machinations. Thus, his reputation tumbles in the eyes of his superiors and his own colleagues. The presence of this accursed devil in human form at an establishment puts an end to all progress and betterment. Such a person creates enmity against his bread basket.
Because of his enmity, this faint-hearted man damages and destroys his friends. But sooner or later he himself falls into the pit he digs for others; he finds none to help or support him. Eventually his enmity absolutely shall find him out.
There is a tendency with man to find out who is a friend or enemy for security matter. For this purpose, the common maxims such as ‘know thy enemy and keep your friends close and your enemies closer’ serves the purpose a great deal.
The word “enemy” is a familiar one in human discourse. To cite an example, Oscar Wilde’s “A man cannot be too careful in his choice of enemies,” is fundamental. After all an enemy is enemy in its entirety unless circumstance changes, in which one party submits and the other forgives. Once John F. Kennedy, in his speech said, “Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.” Here not forgetting does not fully qualify forgiveness; it is like burying the hatchet and leaving the handle out. It is a matter of time, if need be the hatchet one day can be pulled out for a purpose worse than before. Furthermore, Aesop said, “We often give our enemies, the means of our own destruction.” It is easily understood what they mean. As these quotes so clearly indicate, an enemy is an individual with the capacity to threaten one’s wellbeing. Thus, one should constantly monitor such a person closely.
There are indications that the phenomenon of hatred and enmity is common to humans. Literature employs the concept of hatred and enmity. Experience bears witness that enemies are common to classic and contemporary literatures and their conflicts compose much of the most enthralling dramas one can experience. Revenge for transgressions, romantic or otherwise, are among the most common bases of enmity. Another is the power struggle where hatred and enmity play a big role. One in the struggle to climb up the ladder of power has to develop hatred enmity and hatred to get rid of his opponent. Enemies are, rather obviously, still prominent in contemporary narrative as we daily witness.
Enmity has been a prevalent theme in narrative throughout time, as is apparent in the mythologies that comprise much of humanity’s earliest narrative. In the previous section, evidence is provided that enmity/hatred is a meaningful social phenomenon which is common and familiar across time and cultures.
As to the possibility of coming up with solution for enmity and hatred, the chance is remote. While emotions are understandable, nothing in this continuum of what people want leads to any solution for enmity or hatred. For instance enmity in the workplace, the bigger a work environment is, the higher chances of conflicting employees, tendency for disagreements, clashing of personalities. These things are unavoidable at some point or other, the better for the management in terms of adapting to situations and keeping a smooth workplace milieu. It is still impossible to get solution for enmity; however their results might be dealt to some extent. Enmity predominantly exists in human history. Thus, sometimes we simply get torn in the middle between colleagues that can’t stand each other. This can be extended to national level and it takes well-designed efforts to iron out the rough relationship created by enmity and hatred.
By Joseph Soboka
THE ETHIOPIAN HERALD MAY 28/2021
