A couple of years back there was this thirtyish guy who regularly begged in the center of town. The guy really knew his trade; he mastered all the words and gestures which would send your involuntary hands into the pockets however empty they might be. If you saw them of the saddest faces on earth, the fifth one was his. He was that clever. Say one day you give him one birr or so.
Having boosted your CV for the afterlife, you enter a nearby bar for a cup of coffee; call it living within your means. A few minutes later that same guy who made you a birr poorer enters the bar; probably for some tea and a loaf of bread, you think. He heads directly to the bar: No mistaking his deliberately booming voice; “Gordon Gin; and make it double.” Even if you hate the term like the lovely lady who refuses to grant you that second look however much you try, it is time for a big OMG! The only thing double you’ll experience, would probably be your small intestine coiling around the larger one!
This by the way wasn’t a one-off affair. Throughout the day ‘the beggar’ does that repeatedly and always in that same bar! They say beggars can’t be choosers; well the brasses of the financial world have it wrong there; After all, they haven’t seen this guy: he begs, chooses, and chooses big! He opts for the choice of the well-heeled…Gordon Gin.
Once, a friend pointed out to me a beggar with horrendous-looking leg injuries. If no one told you so far self-made makeup artists take care of such things; that’s why many of the beggars appear to have survived a carpet-bombing of a Syrian town. That particular person was, of course, disabled; but not that bad! Every month he, I was told, goes to a particular bank and sends three thousand birr to relatives in the countryside. He then deposits five thousand birr in his account. Every month!
A few months back two able bodied youngsters were caught with three hundred thousand birr plus they amused begging in the streets of Addis. So no wonder begging seems to have evolved into an industry of sorts. When you hear of young ‘beggars’ dancing their nights away in posh nightclubs you know it’s a lucrative career; because it has become a career and nothing less. Four hundred birr average means twelve thousand a month, and, this is music to most of us, it is tax free! Coning the government, after all, is a very favorite sport for many!
Like it or not begging has become a lucrative ‘career.’ That’s what it has become a career! You wouldn’t believe what people engaged in begging are a making these days. I have been shown a very slightly disabled woman who makes an average of four hundred birr a day! Twelve thousand a month! Just think of how many of the hard working populace makes anything close to that! With morals at an all-time low, convincing many to throw away a four hundred birr a day ‘sweepstakes’ would be not learning from the Sisyphus fellow.
By the way these priests always with claims that the funds are needed for the repair of one church or another, they give me the creeps. I think most are con artists out for the kill. A friend was telling me he knows a duo he has seen three years back still begging with the same fading photo of what they claim to be a church. The city is full of con artists playing the role of beggars.
It happened quite some time back: we were in a mini-bus taxi when this guy who looked like one of those giant wrestlers approaches. With a voice that seems to be cast in a Second World war mortar he booms, “Help me: I just came out of prison where I spent fifteen years for murder!” What! What did I do to deserve this! Murder! No wonder he looks so mean! As to the mood in that taxi, turned into a steel cage, ‘sacred’ would be an understatement. We were trembling!
What if some unseen dark forces whispered to him, “Go for the short guy on the third row. Another fifteen years would be a blessing than taking alms from him.” After all, the guy already made his case; the term ‘murder’ was no slip of the tongue. Failure to notice the undercurrent ‘meaning’ would not be his fault. He didn’t have to say it a second time; everyone in that cab obliged.
Finally, about the anti-begging laws in the works, well, I can’t help scratching my head. Really! Come on, the latest UN HDI puts at one hundred seventy six of one hundred ninety plus countries! Something tells me begging is here to stay: I haven’t seen, or heard of the details. If however, by design or divine intervention, begging becomes illegal, at least no one will be having Gordon Gin on my hard earned money while I sit in the bar for three straight hours. Justice would be served!
The Ethiopian Herald Friday 20 December 2019
