Browsing the Internet I stumbled across this title… “If I ruled the world…” Tempting wouldn’t you say? Maybe even if just for the sake of driving the biting cold away there would be no sin in imagining yourself on top of the world, and everyone in it! Given that we are in times when everyone seeks some throne to sit on you wouldn’t be in the wrong demanding my piece of cake!
So, what would I do ‘if I ruled the world?’ A difficult question! It would be difficult if you really mean to ‘rule’ it the right way, whatever that means. Is there really a right way to rule this messy world?) Of course, I wouldn’t tolerate any snooping like, “Can you produce any evidence of experience in ruling anything?” When you rule the world you should make sure that those who think they are smart enough to pin you to the wall with unwelcome questions know there’ll be a lot coming their way unless they fall in line. You want to remain kings of kings or something for long, don’t you? Then rule by ‘example!’ Ha! An example like making sure any head raised a few millimeters over the rest has committed an offense which is next door neighbors to treason!?’
So the first thing I’ll do as a ruler of this godforsaken planet is put all who think they’ve any chance of taking my place in their rightful places. Sorry, we don’t have spare thrones to accommodate your overweight whatever! So go tend chicken or something.
“I’ve heard that you’re plotting something against me.”
“Your majesty, I swear on the soul of my forefathers that I not even for a second…”
“Enough! I don’t care about the souls of your forefathers; I don’t even care whether they’ve any or not. Can’t you at least swear on your own father?”
“Your majesty it has been years since he passed away.”
“I thought that it has been quite long since your forefathers passed away too. Or is your father without his own soul.”
As the ruler of the world you are entitled to say anything and everything and the slightest flinch would be dealt with finality. Don’t you think there are some who hold that line of thought?
“I’ll tell you what….”
“What your majesty. I’d be at your service every minute of my life.”
“Well if you don’t play right you’ll soon be joining your dad.”
“But your majesty…” “Bailiff! Take this fool somewhere before I do something I won’t regret later!” Ha!
I’ll be realigning some places of this world. You know what! It must be the weather that’s making complete nerds out of so many ‘politicians’ in suits. I mean we’ve to jump to their rescue. Their ego is getting the best of them.
The rule is simple, straightforward with no room for amendments of footnotes. You fall in line or you’ll be in for some hell of a forced over some cliff, literal or otherwise! You think I care! Whom have you seen caring enough for this world once the crown is in place? Yes. I knew you’d say “No one!” So, I don’t have any crazy plans of setting any records being the first one. No wisdom in playing softy, softy on the throne!
So I mean this really raises a troubling issue; there seem to be politicians in higher and the highest corridors of power who don’t only think but act too as if they actually rule the world, and with the iron hand too! Just look around all the orders, threats, and abuses being thrown around. There are so many of them there is no chance of you missing them. Especially’ when you’re ‘weak’ and with resources way off from satisfying your needs, the ‘rulers of the world’ come knocking. “You do what we say or you wouldn’t know what hit you!” Such a state of mind, I think, is responsible for most of this world’s mess.
No sir, ruling the world is not for me. May be a shot or two of some really had staff would nudge me back into reality!
The Ethiopian Herald August 22/2021
