“If there had been immortality to mankind- if such a thing ever existed, then being able to love and being able to be loved would have been the keys to it”. Something I read back in quarantine without any specific recollection from where though. Something I did not understand at the first glimpse, something I began to comprehend as time goes by, as I grew by; love.
Regarded as the next indispensable item to man after oxygen and water, love is a complex range of emotions encompassing the tiniest fondness up to the deepest interpersonal affection felt. Despite its diurnal appearance in our daily life, from the love we give to ourselves, to the love we give to the people around and to the unconditional love we are bound to practice, to give and receive throughout our life, is love actually unarguably important to one? Does its importance lie within each of its chambers? Can a person enjoy a meaningful life without love? Or would it be a mere existence?
Considered to be the best type of love, self-love is the most important ingredient in the recipe of our lives. People who love themselves tend to love others more, for how would it be possible to give others something we didn’t manage to give to ourselves, not at least without struggling to do so. Self-love is the complete acceptance of who we are, so we end up giving unconditional support and compassion to ourselves that ultimately translates to good health, self-esteem, happiness, total balance, and well-being.
Yet, there always has been a mistakenly drawn line between selfishness and self-love in society. Hence, loving ourselves might appear as selfishness, which assuring is not as the former is one is all about taking care of oneself while being considerate of others, whilst the latter is all about caring about oneself without thinking of others. Thus, self-love, with its complete distinctness from selfishness, is a critical aspect of life.
Subsequently, after self-love, there comes the crucial builder of our characters in life; parental or relative and peer love. Mostly, people who grew up with parents are entitled often to that form of love in the earliest stages of their lives, but only feel it and appreciate it in the late course of growing up. They claim its importance in their perception of numerous aspects of their life, in their understanding of the ways of the world, and in the overall character formation of themselves, since it is the place we primarily learn what it means to be loved, to be cared for, to be the object of people’s admiration-the apple of their eyes-and learn all the warmth of love it could bring to the coldness of our heart and learn to give it all back. It doesn’t only arise from parents but from our siblings, families, relatives, neighbors, and friends.
The latter, friend’s love, is actually the strongest bond we build initiated only and only by ourselves, without being forced by circumstances or any factors for that matter. We connect to our friends ultimately, voluntarily, and dearly. We develop adoration, mutual affection, and tight closeness with others, and with it, we learn what it means to be their ally, to be their source of strength and comfort through rough times, to be their pillar and support, and most importantly, we learn what it means to be supported.
For it is as infinitely important as being loved, loving others is something we inertly know, but perfect it through the course of our lives. Analogously to the two faces of a coin, when one is loved, he/she forcefully learns to love back. By means, one learns to open oneself to others and discover the capabilities within that account for caring and radiating positive vibes. It is a mirror that reflects the better of everyone on us, by letting us forgive, pardon and excuse others for their mistakes. It is the part of us we give to others, but while receiving much more. Hence through loving others, we discover the best part of ourselves, enhance the good manner of ourselves, develop the best characters within, and give meaning to our existence.
Therefore, by adding one to one, one could never cast doubt or ambivalence to the essentiality love brings to our lives. How self-love balances our well-being, how parental and peer love builds our character, how learning to love others is the only way we grow into the person we deeply desired to be. How life without it—without love—, would only just be limited to survival. How without it, we lose the purpose of life, the beauty in nature, the colors in the rainbow, the warmth in the sun, and the taste in life.
How love is the atmosphere that prevented the radiation of hatred, the comets of detest and the rays of despise among people that would have caused war cancers. How love is the gravity that held people to be close to one another and bond forever. So, I should certainly have to rephrase the question I mentioned earlier; can a person enjoy a meaningful life without love? No, Most certainly not.
BY BITANIYA TADELE
THE ETHIOPIAN HERALD WEDNESDAY 23 AUGUST 2023
